Acts of Service

My dad and I have different languages of love.

Maybe that's why it's hard for us to feel deeply touched by the way we show our love to each other.

Not too long ago, my dad went out to tapau* food for us. He asked us what we'd like to eat.

"Bah Kut Teh," I said like a shot.

My mom and bro ordered Hokkien Mee. And off my dad went.

When he came back, he brought back Hokkien Mee and Cantonese Fried Ying Yong. No Bah Kut Teh. Never mind lor, I love Ying Yong, too and ate it with gusto. And then mom asked him what happened to my Bah Kut Teh (BKT). It seemed that the BKT shop he went to was closed on Friday and so, he had to walk quite a distance to another BKT shop. Which was closed, too. Having tried his best to satisfy my craving, he got the next best thing he knew I liked. Ying Yong.

As he was explaining to mom about his tapau-ing adventures, I sat there eating my Ying Yong thoughtfully.

Now, by right I should have felt all warm and fuzzy and touched by what my dad went through in his attempt to buy food for me. But I wasn't. Reason being, my dad has a penchant to speak in a very loud voice. Almost like shouting. Mom says it's because of a damaged ear drum during a swimming accident during his younger days. He couldn't hear himself talking on softer decibels and thus had to resort to shouting most of the time.

So anyway, I looked at dad and tried to manufacture and squeeze out some kinda loving feeling towards him but felt nothing.

Then I went to cell group and shared the experience with my cell members. As I shared what my dad did for me, I started feeling that warm fuzzy thing in my heart. Wow. I guess the absence of loud voices helped my heart to recognise love in other languages.

And yesterday, my dad helped tremendously in waiting long long hours for my car to be fixed at the workshop and making sure that everything was alright with my car. I thought I saw his face lighted up when I asked him for a favour and he was happy to be of help to me. And this time, I felt truly loved and when I thanked him, it was fresh from the warm fuzzy feelings in my heart.

I guess after all these years, I'm beginning to learn how to appreciate his language of love, which is Acts of Service. After all, that's my bezzie Rina's language of love, too.

And Papa, here's my language of love to you. I love you very, very much. Thanks for loving me from the day I was born. I knew it in my mind all along. But now, I feel it more and more.

* tapau - buy take-away food