One Last Donut

I was reading this book that I've read several times before. With each read, I learn something profound.

This time I learned what it means about not trusting God. When you do not trust someone, you constantly breathe over their shoulders to check on them. You are not sure if they will do what they are expected to do - be it their jobs or their role as a faithful spouse or life partner.

So it is with God. When we commit something to Him in prayer and still worry about it, it shows our lack of trust in Him. For me, I have absolutely no doubts to His abilities. God is a great God, capable of moving the highest mountains and calming the stormiest of seas. My trust problem lies in whether or not God cares enough to do anything about it.

I do sometimes ask God if He has forgotten where I live. Did the opportunity that was supposed to arrive somehow got lost in the traffic?

But reading that book reminded me that a life that lacks trust in my Maker is not a life that is good to live. What kind of life is it when I have to constantly battle with anxiety, perennial worries that I may have missed out on something good and resentment that all the good things have gone to other more aggressive creatures and I am left with unappealing leftovers?

Today, I went out with two lovely friends to Aeon, Bukit Tinggi, Klang for some shopping and eating.

"I must make a stop at Big Apple Donuts," I told my friends solemnly. "I need to get just one Whit Nut donut."

With all the eating and shopping, I only managed to make my way to my favorite donut shop five minutes before their closing time. By then, they had stopped baking and were just clearing out the last of their donuts. But I spotted a single white donut with chocolate etchings on it gleaming from afar.

"Miss, I'm afraid we only have one Whit Nut donut available and some plain ones," the cashier said apologetically.

I blinked in amazement. Of all the variety of flavors available, the one flavor I truly wanted remained. I gave him a huge grin and nodded. "That's perfectly alright! Give me that one Whit Nut donut please."

And not a minute too soon, for just behind me came a family who ordered every single one of the remaining donuts.

I held my precious donut and walked out with a renewed sense of wonderment and trust that God will provide what I need when I need it.